Festival of Colors 2011...

Today I went to Spanish Fork with Aimee (a girl I work with at WSU) and her friend Daniel for the festival of colors. The festival of colors is the Hindu holiday celebrating the welcoming of spring and the mythological triumph of good over evil. It was located at a temple in Spanish Fork. Every few hours there would be a countdown, and a kaleidoscopic explosion of colors filled the air like a powdered rainbow. There was an array of yummy Indian food and lots of lively music. It was a great way to release pressure and tension of everyday life; people dance, and sing and leave everything behind on that field. You forget about race or genders or whatever once you're covered with colors and look like aliens from a different planet. Everything just melts away and we ended up having the time of our lives!!!!

Here are some pictures:




Daniel, Aimee, and Myself waiting for the shuttle to the temple of fun!


This was right after we got there, we were buying our own colors.


Enjoying the yummy Indian food




Standing in one of the temple towers getting a view of all the people




The beautiful temple


Myself, Daniel, and Aimee all colorful right before we headed home.

Who knew throwing colored chalk at people could be so much fun? It was a really fun day!!!!!

Dad update...

So, things have taken me away from keeping up on this blog once again. However, I have come to terms with this fact, I will never be one that updates and post regularly.

Here is a quick update on what has been happening in my life and the lives of the Burton family.

As for me, I am still working hard in all of my classes...only five more weeks left of this semester!!! I have healed from my surgery wonderfully and at my two week appointment all of my restrictions were lifted. I finally heard back from "Metaphor" (Weber State's literary journal), none of the pieces I submitted will be included in this edition. It hurt to hear that, but then again I don't consider myself that great of a writer so all is well. I will include on this post the three pieces I submitted (yes, they are included in earlier post, but I have made modifications to them).

As for the rest of the Burtons, life is still an up and down roller coaster. Dad finally figured out why his face has been swelling, he is allergic to the antibiotic the doctor proscribed. Now that he is no longer on that the only concern is figuring out why his white blood count and platelets are so low. When he was admitted to the hospital back in February his white blood count was at 2.1 (normally between 5 &10) and his platelets were 10 (normally 150-400). Therefore his body would not be able to fight the infection that he had. While he was in the hospital they gave him some platelet transfusions which brought his WBC to 4.5 and his platelets to 97. Still low, but manageable.

Upon being released from the hospital he has gone through several tests. His counts have started to decrease once again. They did a bone marrow biopsy (he had one a few years ago too)but this showed exactly the same thing it did last time---nothing. He has seen an ear, nose, and throat specialist but was told they don't think that is causing any of the problems. Dr. Hansen (the oncologist at McKay Dee) has referred my dad to Huntsman's Cancer Institute since he does not know what is going on. My dad has an appointment next week with them and hopefully we can get a name, condition, and treatment for whatever is going on. My dad is staying hopeful and positive throughout all of this. He has been going to work trying to keep his mind occupied. This week he is finally starting to sound and look better (we believe the sinus infection is finally leaving his system after 2 months). I will post once we know more! Thank you to all our friends and family who have been keeping us in your thoughts and prayers we truly feel them!





As stated above, these are the pieces I submitted to "Metaphor"....

my poems....

Gift of Freedom

Red, White, and Blue
Oh, how can I repay you?
You stand at attention
And yet often go unmentioned.

Your loved ones stand by
So that our flag can fly;
You fight for our voice
and to give us a choice.

Red, White, and Blue
Oh, how can I repay you?
You put yourself in danger,
all for some strangers.

You die so we can live
It’s such a precious gift you give.
As I stand by your grave
I’m grateful you were brave.

Masquerade
Every day is like Halloween,
I wake up and put on a different mask.
Some days I am Bo-Bo the Clown,
laughing away my tears.
Other days I am a biker chick—
my tough exterior hiding the fear I have within.
I once was an heiress to some grand fortune
just to be accepted into a group.
At times I feel like Perfect Penny,
too afraid to show people that I am human.
But, being all of these people is getting exhausting
I am ready to remove my mask and
for the first time be myself!

Crazy week...

Life has been turned a little upside down this past week. I am one that likes to follow a routine and this week has been so disorderly. It started off bad back at the end of January, our sweet Picasso (our family dog) had been having mini seizure/stroke episodes. So, we took her to the vet. He told us it was a simple urinary track infection and to give her these pills and keep and eye on her. Well starting the first week of February she would not eat and kept throwing up at night. So, my dad called the vet and spoke with them; they ordered a x-ray for her. When he took her to get the x-ray she had another one of those episodes..this one being the worse she has had. After this episode she was unable to stand or walk. The vet kept her overnight to hopefully regain some strength and the next day they wanted to do an ultrasound. My dad drove to Salt Lake for her to have the ultrasound. What they found was cancer--everywhere throughout her body. My parents were the ones with her at this time and they made the decision (one I agree with, but it's still difficult) that it would be best to end her pain and suffering and put her down.



She was the sweetest dog, who loved the snow but hated water. She loved to leap and jump on her bones then carry them in her mouth to show everyone what she had. She was so protective and I will miss her greatly.



My week continued to be stressful, my first surgery was on Feb. 4th. I was scheduled to be there bright and early (6:30am), and surgery was at 7:30am. My dad was the one that was able to come with me; which I was so grateful for. He is the only one besides my sister Kacee who can calm me down. My surgeon is a wonderful man and was able to joke around to put me at ease as well. Everything went really smoothly. My gallbladder was removed. After they remove it they open it up and look at it. Inside there was found gallstones that the ultrasound missed. So not only did it not function properly I had gallstones that cause all my pain. I have been recouping and trying to keep my mind occupied. I am not one to sit and just do nothing so it has been difficult.

It has also been difficult, because I haven't felt up to being there for my family when they need me. On Saturday, Feb. 5th my dad woke up with his lips, cheeks, and nose swollen. He went to the Dr. and was told it was a sinus infection. On Sunday he woke up to it being bigger. He decided to go to the E.R. instead of his Dr. They hooked up and I.V. and ran several tests. For the last few years my dad has been battling to keep his white blood cells and platelets up. They have been extremely low; they have done so many tests HIV, Hepatitis, Bone Marrow Biopsy, etc... But everything comes up negative. Well, on Sunday his platelets and white blood cells were extremely low again, so they admitted him to the hospital. This time they gave him a platelet transfusion. Yesterday his swelling was gone and we had hopes that he was being released today, but nope! They had some specialist come and check things out. One of the doctors stated that he will not release him until he figures out why is blood count is so low. He also stated that he is upset that it has gone on for so many years and that doctors have just passed him around not really trying to figure things out. Hopefully they can figure out what is causing all of these problems for my dad and get it fixed.

Hard Working Hands....

A girl who used to live in my ward, Sarah Carruth, is a photographer. A few weeks ago she posted some pictures of her father's hands and talked about them in a way I had never really thought about before. She described her father's hands by saying,

"if you want an example of strength, hard work, and love, look at my Dad's hands. You can literally tell how much life my dad has lived just by glancing at his hands. I remember being really little and holding his hands and marveling at how cracked and calloused they were. How they felt so scratchy to the touch and how his nails, even when very clean were always etched in black"

--http://sarahknightphotography.blogspot.com/2011/01/most-important-project-ill-ever-do.html

This post really tugged at my heart strings. As I read her post I imagined my own father's hands. I remember when I was younger my dad would trace my face with his fingers to help put me to sleep; his hands always so soft and gentle. My dad, like Sarah's, is such a hard worker. Always willing to put in the extra work to get something accomplished. He has used his hands to work in the yard, finish our basement,and comfort us when needed. Sarah's post inspired me to write down a poem about my dad's hands. It is not very well put together, but it is a start of something that I hope will be something I can cherish forever.



Hard Working Hands

Hands that was once beautiful and kind
Now bare the signs of daily grind.
Rigid, callused, and old
If you look closely a story is told.
Each wrinkle a chapter, each scar a test
That was written while doing their best.
They built a home, raised a family, and consoled neighbors
Now they are roadmaps of one’s own labors.
They taught, scolded, and were lifted in prayer
Always ready to dig, lift, or to share.
Now they remind us of life’s treasures
No two hands have brought so much pleasure.

Chronic Cholecystitis....

In other words a faulty gallbladder!

I had been waiting for my HIDA scan results for a few days, when I didn't hear back I called my dr. to find out what was going on. Of course they couldn't find my results, but Dr. Riggs had a note saying to contact a Dr. Joe Jensen and make an appointment.

My appointment with Dr. Jensen was today. After rushing from Weber State all the way to Davis Hospital, I got to sit in a room and wait...

Dr. Jensen finally came in, we discussed a few things (my symptoms, the test Dr. Riggs ordered, etc...). Then he started to look over my test results, 14%, that is what the HIDA scan said my gallbladder functions at. He explained that my gallbladder is not squeezing properly, the only solution, surgery.

Not the exact words I wanted to hear. So, I scheduled the day, February 4th. I am extremely nervous, I have never had surgery before. It is also the worst timing, why couldn't this have happened after I was finished with school?


Also, Dr. Jensen shared with me my results of the ultrasound...no gallstones were visible, however they did find some cysts on my left kidney. Wish I would have heard this from my primary care giver and not my surgeon, but oh well!

Life continued....

Friday was a very busy day. I went to class in the morning, then to my mom's uncle Stephen's funeral, and then to Davis hospital for the HIDA scan.

Stephen's funeral was really nice. I didn't really know Stephen that well, but I know how much he meant to my mom. It was nice to hear my grandpa talk about some of the memories he had of Stephen and how much he meant to him and my grandma. My family does not like to show their emotions that often, so it is nice when they actually do.

After the funeral part my dad and I had to leave for Davis Hospital. My appointment was scheduled at 1pm and I was taken back right away. They put an I.V. in my arm (which went smoother than I thought, my veins are really hard to find). The tech. injected a radioactive dye through the I.V., I had to wait a couple minutes before we could begin the rest of the process. After a few minutes I got onto a table (which was more like a board) to begin. The picture below is similar to what the machine looked like...



The tech. pushed some buttons and I began moving back towards the image zone. This is where the hard part began; I was not allowed to move anymore. In fact they put a wrap around my arms to keep them in place. On the right side of me I had two computer monitors where I could watch when an image was being taken and how long it would last. On the other monitor was the images that were being taken. It was cool to watch the dye move from my liver to eventually my gallbladder. This process took an hour. After this part the tech hooked up a drip into my I.V. that had a drug that would make my gallbladder contract. It was supposed to simulate my gallbladder releasing bile. This part was a bit painful, since it mimicked the pain that I have been having. During this time the machine would take an image every minute and lasted a full 30 minutes.

At 3:20pm the tech. happily stated, "okay we are all done now!"---music to my ears! I was so grateful to be able to move. After the 1.5 hours though I was pretty stiff. I should have the results either Tuesday or Wednesday. I will update then!!!

Life....

Things have been pretty busy for me the last few weeks. I started another semester of school and I am loving it. I have four wonderful classes that have opened me up to looking within myself more. One of my classes is a substance abuse class; we have an assignment to attend an AA or NA meeting. Since I had the first week of school off from work, I decided I would get a jump start on my assignment. I did a little research online and saw that there was an AA meeting being held in Roy, so I decided I would go to it.

I walked into the church building a little apprehensive, but left feeling very humble. As I listened to each person's stories of how they got to their own situation, how they fought against it, and how they started the recovery process I felt selfish for reacting the way I do to some of my so called "stresses". I learned a lot about life, God, trust, love, acceptance, and courage that night. It is something I will keep in my heart forever!

Besides going to school I have been working and studying a lot. I am determined to get straight A's this semester. I also switched doctors. I didn't feel like my old one really listened to me, everything that is wrong with me is due to my weight. Yes, I know I am fat and that I need to do something about it, but not all of my symptoms I am feeling is due to my weight. So, I switched! I went to my first appointment with Dr. Riggs on January 11th, because I have been experiencing a few things. The biggest concern I had was that I have had extreme pain (a sharp stabbing pain) near my sternum. I also have sharp stomach cramps, nausea, and diarrhea after everything I eat; it gets worse if it is greasy, spicy, or dairy products. When I discussed this with my doctor he seemed concerned that it is my gallbladder. He set up an appointment for an ultrasound to see if I have gallstones...it came back negative. Therefore, tomorrow I am having a Hida Scan done. I will lay on a table for an hour or so, they will inject a radioactive dye in my veins, a machine will take pictures as it follows the dye through my veins. This scan will tell them if I have gallstones, if my gallbladder is working properly, if there is any blockage in my bile ducts, etc... If this comes back negative my doctor wants to do a scope to see if I have ulcers.

Here is to hoping that everything is okay!!!